It’s not every day one of the world’s biggest movie stars offers to fulfil your schoolboy fantasy, but Cameron Diaz is not your average movie star. Her role as vodka-swilling, drugged-up, fake-boob-obsessed teacher Elizabeth Halsey in Bad Teacher is a welcome return to There’s Something About Mary-style comedy – except filthier. Miss Diaz, we’ve been bad, bad boys!
Is this your first time playing the “sexy teacher” in real life?
Well, it’s the first time for a magazine! I think “sexy teacher” is one of the first on the checklist of fantasy costumes for most guys. With the Bad Teacher theme here, I thought I should have been smoking weed with students and doing beer bongs, but we went for the straight-up sexy-teacher fantasy.
Let’s try things your way next time. Bad Teacher takes you back to your dirty-comedy roots. What drew you to it?
There weren’t enough bodily fluids exchanged in my films in recent times, so I had to go ahead and search it out.
We’re certainly glad you made the effort. How foul-mouthed are you in real life?
I’m the worst. I’m trying to cut back.
What’s your favourite curse word?
“C–ksuckermotherf–ker!” It really kind of flows out very easily for me, unfortunately.
That’s cheating combining two swears into one, but we’ll let you off – this time. Ever been caught smoking pot in the car like your character?
Oh, sure! I’ve definitely been like, “Throw it out! Throw it out!”
You have a dry-humping scene with Justin Timberlake in Bad Teacher. Got any tips for a mutually satisfying dry hump?
Well, you have to have the right clothing – you don’t want anything rough that causes chafing. And there has to be a lot of contact. It’s a full-body sport, like a wrestling match.
When was the last time you dry-humped?
One should dry-hump as much as possible. It leads to great things. I’d prescribe at least once per day. What’s also nice about dry humping is that it can happen anywhere.
Good advice. Your Bad Teacher character is obsessed with getting new breasts. What are your thoughts on boob jobs?
If you want your boobs to be massive, that’s your prerogative. I have no judgment on that.
Seeing as you’re in teacher mode, could you give us a lesson on relationships?
I love men more than anything. I want all men to be happy and have rad women in their lives. But guys need women who challenge them and don’t let them get away with their shit. Women, conversely, need to not be crazy bitches who blow up when their guys tell them something that scares them.
Do you still think marriage is a dying institution?
Yeah, I do. I think we have to make our own rules. I don’t think we should live our lives in relationships based off of those old traditions that don’t suit our world any longer.
WORDS: ruth hilton; photos: Gavin bond; Styling: Jonas Hallberg/tracey mattingly; prop styling: abraham latham/artmix; hair: colin gold/Joe management; make-up: christy coleman/the wall group; manicurist: kimmie keys using Orly int’l/celestine agency; grooming: roxy using temptu/artmix beauty
For the full feature and images grab the August 2011 issue of MAXIM Australia.
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